Wednesday, July 22, 2015

A Short Visit

Ever so softly Kelly-Anne stroked my right hand this morning as I lightly slept. She woke me as the sun shone through our bedroom window. As I awoke, I knew she was nearby. Her message was clear, it was time to wake up and face the the new day with optimism and hope.

Another bright summer morning. I feel renewed, strong and ready to meet new people and see new places. A new challenge awaits me.

I know Kelly-Anne has my back.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015


Two children age  four and three months  have lost their parents. This is tragic, the murder last week of Samantha Higgins is so upsetting, so painful and senseless. Looking at  Samantha's mother's face only brings back the despair and emptiness that I once  felt. She and her family have a long road ahead of them.

 In most murder cases of this nature, the boyfriend is the first  person the police look at. I  question  like many what happened that night. Who was minding the children as they slept ? Did  he leave them alone ?  These children have lost their mother and father. A first degree murder charge will keep  Nicholas Fontainelli in  prison forever, I hope. Those children need the love and support of their extended  family.

There is  so much we do not know at this point, but the story will unfold in court. I just hope that the accused takes responsibility for the crime and pleads guilty. It is wish full thinking on my part, but it is the only way the family can be spared a lengthy trial. Canadian laws protect the accused until proven guilty. Even if he is convicted, Fontainelli will have a month to request an appeal.

As I have said on many an occasion, our laws need to be more like the United States. However with the new crime bill, this accused should  remain behind bars with no eligibility for  parole. These are the people we do not want on our streets ever. It becomes a larger financial burden for Canadians to house these offenders, but I feel it is best that we protect our streets.

Now it is time for the Higgins family to get the support they need to help them understand what lies ahead. I wish them courage and strength.  Rest in peace Samantha.

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

The Innocent

He was unhappy that he was getting a divorce. He had children and the youngest was only 10 months old. An innocent babe with no one to protect him from a father that couldn't deal  with rejection and God only knows what else.  We learnt of this murder-suicide a few days after another man with financial issues takes down a notary  and a lawyer, both in the prime of their lives. The man returns home and kills his two sons and then ends his own  life. I have said it before and now will repeat myself...if you can't cope with life and do not want to live and face your hardships and feel that ending your life is the only recourse you have...well I ask that you  leave everyone else alone especially your wife and children and just  leave this world however you choose to do so. 

The father kills his innocent baby as revenge so his wife and remaining children can live in pain for the rest of their lives.This irrational blinded thinking is something that I still  have a difficult time to grasp. This is domestic abuse at its worst. 

I can only think that people who commit murder-suicide are so blinded. All they see are four black walls that surround them. They cannot see pass those walls and have a way of hiding their true feelings or intentions. The cover up of being the nice neighbour. It is true we do not know what goes on in other peoples homes. Abuse is so loud to the people who live inside these walls but so silent to those who walk pass and admire the pretty flower beds that line their front doors.

Everyone has a cross to bear. I feel that I have faced the worst. When I listen to others tell me about their problems (and for some strange reason people have a way of opening up to me) I see that their problems do  have solutions. However, for them they have a very difficult time believing that there is a solution. I understand these people. For them this is the biggest challenge that they have ever faced and I won't minimize their pain.To truly understand one's pain one must have to walk in their shoes. And of course we don't wish that on anyone. At lease I don't.