Another Birthday

Today would of marked Kelly-Anne's 31st birthday. Today we can only imagine if she were alive how happy and proud she would of been. That smile, those curly locks and perhaps a little toddler with those same curls lagging behind her dragging a blanket and a favorite stuffed animal. We will never know what might of been.

This evening,once again for the 6th year, we will gather to toast Kelly-Anne and remember her spirit, her perseverance and determination towards competitive life guarding. For many in attendance, they will not have known Kelly-Anne. They will only of known her by her reputation as being a world class athlete. Her legacy continues to live on in those who challenge themselves to the harsh waves and deep waters of our oceans.

For me, the pain doesn't go away. The lump is still my throat. I just get better at masking my true feelings. I put on a smile and forge forward each day remembering what Kelly-Anne would expect me to do. The swimming gets better and each time I flex my arm and see the strength of my muscles, I hear Kelly-Anne in my head with that little chuckle of pleasure and envision that smile of approval on her face.

They say time heals...that's a crock of bull. They should say...time changes things :life and oneself becomes different.

I love you and miss you each day Kelly-Anne.xxxxx

Video: Sister's Keeper

Here is a video from today's Gazette where Kim speaks openly of the loss of Kelly-Anne. Again, I am in awe of Kim.



Video: Sister's Keeper

Thoughts about Kelly-Anne

Here we are already in November. They say that November is the month of the dead. I tend to agree with that. Last week I attended a church service remembering the dead and of course prayers for Kelly-Anne were said. November is such a dismal month. The sun is shining today, but that is a rarity.

Last week I had a conference call with the hard working committee members for Kelly-Anne's cocktail. It the same each year at this time. We plan the cocktail fundraiser and work hard at getting donations and selling tickets. I wonder what Kelly-Anne is thinking about all of this. It's weird to be planning her birthday party each year as she is not in attendance. Only her spirit is there. Kelly-Anne's steadfast lifesaving friends will be there too. How proud Kelly-Anne would be to see that her friends who she competed with now have children. Their lives have moved forward and I know that Kelly-Anne as I is happy for that.

Who else, I ask goes thought this each year on their deceased daughter's birthday? Sometimes I feel so different that everyone else...maybe because I am different. I still can't get away from the fact that I walk under a black cloud. I'm labeled.

I will take pride in contributing to honoring Kelly-Anne on her 31st birthday. My family and friends are so supportive and will join me to raise a glass to toast Kelly-Anne. I can only believe that she will be looking down and beaming in admiration over the the many people who work hard to keep her memory alive and at the same time work to insure that lives are saved through the hard work of the Quebec Lifesaving Society.