Monday, March 24, 2008

The Signs

Here are a few signs of what an abusive relationship can be. I speak about this at the conferences which I give. These are the signs which I learnt only after Kelly-Anne was murdered. I am hoping that what I have learnt will help someone else.

Unsettling feeling inside of you
He does not like you not having the same opinion as himself
Your family or friends may not be accepting of your relationship
You feel uncomfortable doing what he wants
You do not feel comfortable with him in the company of others as he is unpredictable
You catch little white lies he tells others, but try to ignore them
You feel that he is constantly manipulating you
He is frequently loosing jobs
He is always asking you for money
He is isolating you from your family and friends
He has a lack of respect for your family and friends
He does not like any of your friends
He picks fights and makes you believe that it is your fault, not his
He does not want to cooperate with you
He makes you feel that it is always your fault if something doesn’t go his way
He call you names
You feel that he is not trustworthy
He tries to intimidate you
He borrows objects and never returns them
He pushes you, shoves you , hits you
He starts to throw and break objects around you
He threatens you.
He makes comments such as:
1.“ You are ugly, nobody else is going to want to go out with you.”
2. “ Don’t push me or I am going to put you on the street and you will have nothing. You need me.”
3.“ I can’t live if you leave me.”
You no longer see your family or friends
You feel that you are not respecting him enough and that it is really your fault
He answers the phone and tells the person at the other end of the line that you are not there when you really are
You are lying for him
You are financing him

If this is you....there is help available. You can get out before it is too late.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thank u for this info